Rule 13: Don’t Limp Fish

Famous Actor Richard Mofe Damijo with Famous Comedian,  Teju Baby Face

We
shake hands often and usually quite unconsciously.  How many times do you have to shake hands
during a normal business week?  And how
much thought do you give to it?  There
are so many signals given during that brief handshake though, that you really
ought to make it supremely confident, utterly secure and convincingly
reassuring.  When someone shakes hands
with you they should be left with the impression of strength, confidence; power
and of someone totally in control of themselves – that’s you of course.  It you are in any doubt about the ‘rightness’
of your handshake get a friend to tell you.

How
do you make it better?  Make it
firm.  You can always use the other hand
to reassuringly grip both your hand and that of your
boss/colleague/client.  But don’t overdo
it and leave them with crushed fingers.
You
can always adapt your handshake to make it more individual, or memorable.  My grandfather had a wonderful handshake; he
just used his first two fingers (the fore and index) and his thumb and gripped
very firmly. You felt as if you were shaking hands with royalty.
Handshakes
are very formal, old fashioned things. 
Forget about the high fives, the Masonic twitches or anything gangster-style.  Stick to the old fashioned sort of shake and
you will be remembered as someone confident and authoritative.

“Handshakes are very
formal, old fashioned things.  Forget
about the high fives, the Masonic twitches or anything gangster-style.  Stick to the old fashioned sort of shake and
you will be remembered as someone confident and authoritative”.

Good
shakers are the ones who proffer their hand first as well as shaking well. They
exude confidence by announcing their name and offering their hand at the same
time thus showing keenness, friendliness, a relaxed and confident approach and
a general air of assertiveness.  They
also look you in the eyes and say your name back to you.  We like hearing our own name and it is aide
memoire.
When
you do announce your name the word that goes first is ‘Hello’.  That’s it. You
might like to be modern and friendly and say ‘Hi’ – that’s up to you. But the
good Rules Player says ‘Hello’.  And follows that with their name.  And your name is also formal and old
fashioned.  It is never ‘Hi, I’m Dave, from Marketing’.  The effect
is pleasant enough and certainly friendly, but you will have impressed no one,
gained no benefit or advantage and brought yourself down to just about the
level of the most junior person there. 
Much better to say, ‘Hello, I’m
David Simpson, Marketing Manager’
. 
This immediately separates you from the herd and makes you more senior
to anyone else there.  Follow this up
with a firm, confident handshake and you will have them eating out of your
hand.
(Excerpts from THE RULES OF WORK by Richard Templer Read “How to exude
Confidence and Energy”
from The
Rules
tomorrow on Asabeafrika)








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