|Billionare Industrialist, Mr. Oba Otudeko with Ex-First Lady, Dame Patience Ibifaka Jonathan|
the Rules of Life into 5 Areas—you, your partner, your family, your social
circle (including work and friends) and lastly, the world—to represent the 5
unconscious circles we all draw around ourselves.
with the most important of these, the Rules for ourselves—personal rules, rules
for us. These are the Rules that will help get us out of bed in the morning,
face the world with a positive air and navigate our way safely and successfully
through our day, no matter what may arise. These are the Rules that will help
reduce stress levels, give us the right kind of outlook, encourage us to set
our own standards and have goals to aim for.
each and every one of us, these Rules
will have to be adapted to take into account our upbringing, our age and our
situation. We all need to have personal standards to live up to. They will vary
from person to person, but it is very important to have them. Without them we
are adrift and unable to monitor how we are doing. With them we have a firm
center, somewhere we can get back to, somewhere to touch base and recharge.
They are our benchmark for personal progress. But it’s not all about standards;
it’s also about lightening up, having fun, and enjoying life.
about to be a Rule’s Player. You are
about to embark on a life changing adventure, possibly, if you choose to accept
your mission. You are about to discover ways to become positive, happier, more
successful in everything you do. So, there is no need to say anything to anybody
about it. Keep quiet. No one likes a smart arse. That’s it. First Rule: Keep it
under your hat.
well be times when you do want to talk to other people about what you are doing
because, quite naturally, you want to share it with somebody. Well, you can’t
and you don’t. Let them find out for themselves with no clues from you. You may
think this unfair but it is actually fairer than you believe. If you tell them,
they will shy away. And quite rightly so—we all hate being preached at. It’s a
bit like when you give up smoking and suddenly find this new healthier way of
living and you simply have to convert all your old smoking friends. Trouble is,
they aren’t ready to quit yet and you find they label you as smug or a pig,
even worse, an ex-smoker; and how we all hate those.
Rule is, quite simply, don’t preach, propagate, try to convert, shout from the
rooftops or even mention this.
a warm glow from changing your attitude to life and have people ask what is it
you have done, are doing and you can say that it is nothing, merely a sunny day
and you feel better/happier/livelier/jollier/whatever. There is no need to go
into any detail because that’s not really what people want to know.
is exactly the opposite of what they want to know. It is a bit like when
someone asks how you are. What they want to really hear is just the one word,
‘Fine’. Even if you are in the very pit of despair, that’s all they want to
hear because anything more requires commitment on their part. And for a casual ‘How are
you?’ that’s most certainly not what they want. What they want is just ‘Fine’. And then they can be about their
business without any further involvement. If you don’t say ‘Fine’, but instead unburden yourself, they will back off pretty
same with being a Rules Player. No
one really wants to know, so keep quiet. How do I know? Because when I wrote The
Rules of Work, which turned a lot of people unto the ability to be
successful in the work place without having to resort to underhand means, I
suggested the same thing and found it worked. Just get on with it, do it
quietly and go about your daily life happily and smugly without having to tell
of Life by Richard Templar. Read
Rule 2 in our next post on Asabeafrika)