The desperation of President Goodluck Jonathan

“Don’t pray
for the long life of a foolish child, because his foolishness will kill him
before he grows old” – Anonymous

President Jonathan with Alaafin of Oyo
would have loved to title this article “The Desperate President” but I
yielded to a more elaborate theme that really encapsulates the recent action of
President Goodluck Jonathan. Just less than a year to the presidential
election, President Jonathan who has not even woken up to the responsibility of
making a declaration has suddenly woken up to the reality of making last minute
substitutes that will endear him to the hearts of many ‘ignorant

The good thing about
President Jonathan is the fact that he believes Nigerians are the most foolish
people living on the surface of the earth; and that they are so cheap that they
can be bought over by what I call “exigency of the moment”.  The Man from Otuoke village in Ogbia Kingdom,
South-South Bayelsa state is also a man who loves to talk with his body than
his mouth. But one thing I also like about him is the fact that he is not so
good at the game of playing power with decorum. He lacks the mannerism and
chemistry of myth building and that is why everything from the PDP, CBN, NNPC
and even the Presidency has crumble on his head with a large number of
Nigerians claiming that he has failed as a leader.
President Jonatha with Emir of Kano
was not surprised that 8 days after I raised the issue of 3 ministers namely
Stella Oduah of Aviation; Godsday Orubebe of Niger Delta Ministry and Nyesom
Wike of Education ministry in my article “Why we need to Sack President Jonathan”
which was posted on this blog on February 5, two of the funny ministers were
fired; that is Oduah and Orubebe. Oduah who is now famously addressed as “The
BMW Queen” was enmeshed in a N255 million naira scam at her duty post, which
had to do with buying two exotic automobiles for an exorbitant amount of N255
Million Naira that was far beyond her statutory allocation. The very arrogant
and stupid woman did not even show remorse as she kept appearing on pages of
news papers commissioning projects and flaunting her stupidity at will without
shame; and to the extent of even calling a journalist who dared to ask
questions about her infamous scandal during one of her illegal outings “an illiterate”.
second man, Elder Godsday Orubebe earned my discredit right from the day he
engaged in a stupid war of words with veteran boxer and Guinness Book of Record
aspirant Bash Ali over some little issues that involved Bash and Orubebe’s
ministry. Only God knew what transpired between the two and you need to see the
kind of verbal missile Orubebe threw at Bash via Short Message System (I still
have some of the publications at home) and since then, Orubebe was written off
as someone that can never be held in high esteem. He does not worth the post of
a federal minster of a nation; he would have done better as a Local Government
chairman, and even some of those lots are more couth and refined than the
sacked elder. The big irony today is that Bash Ali has his way and Orubebe is
now history. You can google the story and you will be fed more.  The third man of course is Nyesom Wike the
cantankerous Supervising Minister of Education and “Minister of Special Duties
for Rivers State Affairs”.  This man is a
super pimp for egoistic warfare between the first family and some perceived
enemies in Rivers State.
President Jonathan is known for one very bad thing; sluggishness. He never
takes decision when it matters most. The Boko Haram issue is a classical case
for study. On many issues, Jonathan has played low rather than play high. Even
the current $49.8 billion Scandal in NNPC and several other financial scams in
the polity, Mr. Jonathan has always turned a blind eye. He annoys rational
minded people with his sleepy action and elephantiasis discretion. He will
never take action when the Ovation is loud until when the chips are down and
things have gone bad in terms of perception and reality that he finds his will
to act. He didn’t sack Oduah when it matter most, he didn’t query Orubebe when
the issue was hot but this same man sacked other nine ministers last year for
what many still termed as “Political Sin” and mere loyalty to other saner
politicians in the polity. So, why sack Oduah now? Why sack Orubebe now? Why
sack the rest now? Maybe the other two were to just make the list look real. I
can prophesy now that Jonathan might soon throw away a cerebral minister like
Malam Bolaji Abdulahi; why do I say so? I will tell you when the deed is done.
President Jonathan with Oba of Lagos
why did Jonathan became suddenly upbeat to the extent of sacking Stella Oduah
his favorite queen among the powerful four (Patience, Diezani, Okonjo and
Stella), why did he do some certain things last week? I think the answer lies
in the 2015 Presidential election. Jonathan want to run, and with the hate rate
in the polity, the President needs to throw some carrots at the same people he
wouldn’t “Give a damn” about when it comes to the issue of declaration of
assets (Remember the NTA Presidential chat of 2012); suddenly he had to offload
Stella Oduah who happens to be his biggest political liability in recent times.
And perhaps Mr. President is very confused and in short of the wisdom to
appease Nigerians. In the last few months, I suddenly discovered that
Lagos-Abeokuta Express Road which happens to be one of the pot hole filled roads
in my part of town started wearing some patch-patch look with most of the
deadly holes covered by agents of the Federal Ministry of work. Yes, Onomolemen
or what is his name is another minister I think deserves to be changed. This
fat and robust man from Edo state is more of a politician than a technocrat; he
loves designer wears, good Kaftan attires and robust press coverage. He loves
to be seen shining than working. But because Jonathan is desperate to return in
2015, at all cost, Onomolemen has started patching some of the major roads so
that people can say ‘at least our cars don’t run into potholes any longer’ and
maybe that will swing votes in favor of the Unsure Ogbia local leader turn
Nigerian President.
President Jonathan with Oni of Ife
next move was for President Jonathan to hurriedly pay a “Pajawiri” visit to
some emirs and Obas in Yoruba land last weekend. He actually started with the
Emir of Yola two weeks ago and last week, he used just a day to visit Emir of
Kano, Ooni of Ife, Alaafin of Oyo and Oba of Lagos. The good thing about
desperation is that it can’t be hidden. Desperate people often showcase their
desperation through the act itself. From the looks on the face of Jonathan and
the royal fathers he visited as super imposed on the pages of newspapers the
next day,  the expression revealed just
one thing—-2015! The heroic welcome and mass presence arranged by the
likes of Jumoke Akinjide the Minister of State, FCT for Jonathan at Ibadan
Airport was too partisan in nature. In fact it got to a climax when APC
supporters also showed their own political might by double-crossing the PDP crowd
at the airport. Some of the royal fathers like the Ooni of Ife and Emir of Kano
never really gave Jonathan a long time to talk, for instance the Emir of Kano
only advised the President to ensure the total security of the citizen of
Nigeria, nothing more. No 2015 talk. For Ooni, it was a closed door affair and
no press interview allowed. But Alaafin was different, he not only gave
Jonathan a talking drum gift, he equally allowed the Ijaw man to talk and drum
his aspiration inside his palace to a crowd of guests and by extension
Nigerians. And what Jonathan said as usual mirrored his intention for 2015. His
comments and commendation in presence of the Iku-Baba-Yeye was full of
political fragrance.  Hear what Thisday
Newspaper on Sunday wrote “The President told a crowd of residents at a
reception in his honor that he had come to thank the people of the South-West
for the support they gave him during the 2011 Presidential election” so, why
didn’t Jonathan come and thank these people in 2012 or after the election; why
now and why you doing it when it is less than a year to another election, why
are you so desperate? Why? Why? And why? But the Alaafin who is probably
smarter than Jonathan refrained from ascribing any political meaning to the
visit but claimed that President Jonathan had come to appreciate the peace in
the state and ‘wanted the monarchs to continue to maintain peace in their
domains’, you see the wisdom of political sagacity in action? I hope the drum
the Alaafin gave Jonathan is one for positive and not negative vibes (Ilu
Ibanuje 2015
). The next point of call was Lagos where President
Jonathan damned the consequence of nature to visit Oba Osualale Akiolu of Lagos
at around 8pm. The president was indeed desperate to meet all these Yoruba
Kings at their own displeasure and ask for their royal blessing for 2015. All
these were just within a spate of seventy two hours or there about after Stella
Oduah and others were politically sacrificed to assuage emotions across the
nation. But I can tell Mr. President that he got it wrong this time around, the
biggest miracle that will happen in 2015 is that someone else will seat in Aso

President Jonathan with Pastor Adeboye

next day, Sunday 16th, I saw his picture with that of Daddy G.O of
the Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG) and his wife, Mummy G.O. at the
Olive Three branch of the church in Ikoyi during a special service gracing the
pages of newspapers. Maybe President Jonathan want to extend an Olive three to
his detractors and as usual, Baba Enoch Adejare Adeboye is the best consultant.
To show how bad the situation is, our president was still on the same white
attire he adorned a day before when he was meeting Ado Bayero, Ooni, Alaafin
and Olowo Eko. From the looks on his face, it was just too sure that this man
needs something from everybody and this was just a time to play the politics of
everybody. Well, he has not started; he has only visited few kings in Yoruba
land, he has not even visited the Olowu of Owu, Oba Dosunmu Amororo who gave
him an auspicious title of “Obateru” on Friday 6th of October 2006.
He has not visited the Alake of Egba land, he has not visited the Awujale of
Ijebu, he has not visited the Oba of Benin whom I am sure would lambast him
privately; he has not visited the emir of Nupe, he has not visited the Osemawe
of Ondo kingdom and many other traditional rulers with political relevance
across the country. So, the job never finish o; and to those who are receiving
Jonathan quickly at the moment and who thinks they have found an angel, we have

And finally,
finally; never underestimates these three things (1) A desperate politician’s
abilities (2) A desperate politicians’ cunning and (3) A desperate politician’s
greed.  Never overestimate them either.
Remember, there is no such thing as a cheap politician.