There were 3
Nigerians living together in a London apartment—an Igbo, a Yoruba
and a Hausa. They had a common problem of starvation facing them as
they didn’t have money for food.
Nigerians living together in a London apartment—an Igbo, a Yoruba
and a Hausa. They had a common problem of starvation facing them as
they didn’t have money for food.
One day,
when they got to a posh London restaurant in a classy neighborhood, they
hatched a plan on how to have a free lunch. The Hausa man went in first.
After sitting down, he ordered a three-course meal with white wine. When he had
finished the meal, the waiter came by with the bill.
when they got to a posh London restaurant in a classy neighborhood, they
hatched a plan on how to have a free lunch. The Hausa man went in first.
After sitting down, he ordered a three-course meal with white wine. When he had
finished the meal, the waiter came by with the bill.
“Kei, aboki, what are you asking? I
have paid you!’ the Hausa man shouted! The
waiter was very confused as he could not remember collecting any money from the
Hausa man. Fearing any unwarranted row with the Nigerian, he allowed the Hausa
man to go away. A few minutes later, the Igbo man walked into the same
restaurant and ordered a five-course meal with red wine. When he had finished
eating, the waiter presented a bill for settlement. Just like the Hausa
man did, the Igbo man shouted.
have paid you!’ the Hausa man shouted! The
waiter was very confused as he could not remember collecting any money from the
Hausa man. Fearing any unwarranted row with the Nigerian, he allowed the Hausa
man to go away. A few minutes later, the Igbo man walked into the same
restaurant and ordered a five-course meal with red wine. When he had finished
eating, the waiter presented a bill for settlement. Just like the Hausa
man did, the Igbo man shouted.
“Chineke, God; come see me for
trouble o! I have paid you already” The shouting was so much that the restaurant manager, who
incidentally was also Igbo, came to the scene and had to
calm down the Nigerian because he did not want to embarrass a fellow tribesman.
After the traditional greeting of “Kedu ko o di/Odinma” he let the
Igbo guy go.
trouble o! I have paid you already” The shouting was so much that the restaurant manager, who
incidentally was also Igbo, came to the scene and had to
calm down the Nigerian because he did not want to embarrass a fellow tribesman.
After the traditional greeting of “Kedu ko o di/Odinma” he let the
Igbo guy go.
Five minutes
later, it was the Yoruba man’s turn to enter the restaurant. After taking his
seat, he lit a cigarette, and ordered the most expensive meal on the menu along
with whisky. The meal over, the waiter came to the Nigerian to explain his
earlier plight with the Hausa man and the Igbo man saying “Sir…Today has not been pleasant for me, could you believe it that two
Nigerians came here earlier on today,
had their meals, and when it came to time of paying for the food and drinks, they
both claimed to have previously paid
me. And I don’t remember collecting any dime from any of them! I can’t
understand it. So…” The Yoruba
man interrupted “I really pity you, but
seriously speaking, that is your problem. Anyway, let me have my change! After
all, my total bill is not up to the five pounds I gave you!”
later, it was the Yoruba man’s turn to enter the restaurant. After taking his
seat, he lit a cigarette, and ordered the most expensive meal on the menu along
with whisky. The meal over, the waiter came to the Nigerian to explain his
earlier plight with the Hausa man and the Igbo man saying “Sir…Today has not been pleasant for me, could you believe it that two
Nigerians came here earlier on today,
had their meals, and when it came to time of paying for the food and drinks, they
both claimed to have previously paid
me. And I don’t remember collecting any dime from any of them! I can’t
understand it. So…” The Yoruba
man interrupted “I really pity you, but
seriously speaking, that is your problem. Anyway, let me have my change! After
all, my total bill is not up to the five pounds I gave you!”
Culled from the Book, Read ‘n’ Laugh: First 100 Jokes of Our Time
by Olaleye Falore
by Olaleye Falore
